Friday, March 29, 2013

ouch

It has been one of "those" kind of weeks.  You know the kind...when you feel like there may be a vice of epic proportions tightening it's weight against your life.
When things break and food burns.
When you make a special dinner for yourself and give yourself food poisoning.
When your heart breaks again and again for no apparent reason and no amount of meditating or gratitude lists will ease the tension.  
When "lonely" takes up residence and refuses to leave.
On weeks like these there is only ONE thing I know to do: get my butt up a mountain and stay there for awhile.  Which is exactly what I did.
I bundled up and hiked a steep slope, serenaded by birdsong and wind.
I eased into the stillness.
About two-thirds of the way up I found a flatish spot free from cacti and mud and I lay down.
I closed my eyes and felt.
Soon the sadness and longing took a second seat to an overwhelming sense of belonging.
Heart open, my lungs inhaled the crisp late afternoon air.
I stretched out my arms and pulled the horizon around me like a blanket, tucking it close beneath my chin and fell asleep.
When I awoke, I was reminded that I don't have to get it right...any of it right. I can't.
I hiked the rest of the trail in silence.

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