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My boy broke his left arm this weekend, while being drug across pavement behind our dog, on his face.  Now how's that for a shitty day?  I love this child with an abandon that keeps stretching my heart to new bounds.  I love him for so many reasons, selfless and selfish.  One of them is that Bodhi teaches me to love myself...to dive into life without making apologies.  Bodhi is not ashamed of his all-boy attitude. He gladly dons a pink tutu in public, wears black nail polish and makes a gun out of anything remotely resembling a weapon.  His favorite color is pink.  He loves watermelon, candy and meat.  He doesn't "get" why so many people are wearing clothes when it is obviously too hot.  He pees wherever he is and doesn't really comprehend the social propriety of toilets and hiding.  He talks in unnatural octaves about whatever is on his mind and experiences life fiercely.  He says "Hello" to everyone.  If you are old he says "You are old.  I like your hair."  If you are being an asshole he says, loud enough to carry, "Mama, why does that persons face look like that?".  I love him because he puts my social-pleasing-nice-seeming-do things right- and- make people like me-bullshit right in my face.  He makes me look at it, get uncomfortable and GROW!  He is among my greatest teachers.
This week we started back to school (summer camp) and Bodhi  is having fun but doesn't really want to be there.  He is in pain and he is pissed as hell to see some other little usurper sitting on his mothers lap.  I get it now.  I understand him better than I ever have before and my heart hurts... in that way that only a mothers can... in true and utter compassion, empathy and GUILT.

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